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Childfree is the way to be (for me!)

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  • Childfree is the way to be (for me!)

    This thread is being created to remove the off-topic chatter from another thread. Feel free to jump in if you desire.

    For those interested, my fiance and I made a choice to not have children. We felt that given our limited free time and resources, we would not be good parents. After all, if one cannot keep a litterbox or backyard spotless from cat and dog waste, when can one possibly find the time for a child? Besides the 250,000+ kids in the adoption system were additional evidence to us that we didn't need to bring another life into the world.

    Anyhow, the moniker "child-free" separates us from those who really WANT to have kids, but cannot - the childless - as we took fertility tests to see if a vasectomy was necessary instead of finding out who was at fault for not conceiving.

    Additional reading here if you're interested in the childfree lifestyle and why someone would choose it.
    My first attempt at a carputer.

    PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

  • #2
    Posted from the original (hi-jacked) thread - benefits of not having kids... the short list:
    • Lovemaking any time, day or night, anywhere - kitchen, living room - wherever.
    • Sleeping in on weekends.
    • Peaceful, quiet households.
    • Clean floors/no stepping over toys.
    • Garages you can park cars in, not store toys in.
    • Restful, relaxing vacations and the money to afford them.
    • Sports cars, not mini-vans/SUVs.
    • Whining is only something you here at work.
    My first attempt at a carputer.

    PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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    • #3
      you know ... it is indeed frowned upon to choose to be 'child free' ... and that really is silly if you think about it.

      sure it's true that if no one reproduced humanity would die off (which might be a good thing) ... but on the flip side, if EVERYONE had two and a half kids (I'm really looking forward to having that half baby) the earth will continue to become over populated until we all are forced to live in poverty. That doesn't sound like fun.

      So I say more power to those who choose not having kids is the responsible thing to do. Even if it is a selfish thing to do (not have kids so you can focus on your own life) ... isn't it better to be honest with your selfishness than to be a sub par parent?

      the bane of our existance is that reproducing is easy to do on accident (if you're irresponsible) also enjoyable. So it stands that those who are irresponsible, and therefore more likely to be bad parents, are statistically more likely to reproduce.

      what a world.
      My JeepPC Install

      "there are no stupid questions, just stupid people."

      "it's been agreed the whole world stinks so no one's taking showers anymore"

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      • #4
        Originally posted by shakes
        you know ... it is indeed frowned upon to choose to be 'child free' ... and that really is silly if you think about it.

        sure it's true that if no one reproduced humanity would die off (which might be a good thing) ... but on the flip side, if EVERYONE had two and a half kids (I'm really looking forward to having that half baby) the earth will continue to become over populated until we all are forced to live in poverty. That doesn't sound like fun.

        So I say more power to those who choose not having kids is the responsible thing to do. Even if it is a selfish thing to do (not have kids so you can focus on your own life) ... isn't it better to be honest with your selfishness than to be a sub par parent?

        the bane of our existance is that reproducing is easy to do on accident (if you're irresponsible) also enjoyable. So it stands that those who are irresponsible, and therefore more likely to be bad parents, are statistically more likely to reproduce.

        what a world.
        word. We dont need more people that cant handle a child nor want to.
        I GIVE FREE HUGS!
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        • #5
          Originally posted by shakes
          you know ... it is indeed frowned upon to choose to be 'child free' ... and that really is silly if you think about it.
          Misery loves company, thus those with children want others to join them. But seriously, society has conditioned us to behave as we do. If you think about your childhood, you probably heard "what do you want to be when you grow up?" That's conditioning. "Where are you going to college?" Conditioning that assumes you're attending college. "Got a girlfriend?" Conditioning that assumes you're straight. "When you guys getting married/when you gonna make an honest woman of her?" Conditioning that assumes you'll follow the societal norms of matrimony. After marriage, "when you having kids/how many kids you having?" More societal conditioning.

          I have to admit that I ask the kid question of those who know our childfree choice, just to egg them on!

          Originally posted by shakes
          sure it's true that if no one reproduced humanity would die off (which might be a good thing) ... but on the flip side, if EVERYONE had two and a half kids (I'm really looking forward to having that half baby) the earth will continue to become over populated until we all are forced to live in poverty. That doesn't sound like fun.
          You bring up one of the points we considered. Overpopulation is a reality. Studies have shown that societies rarely control their growth rate properly and those societies that exist with a set limit on their resources die off. Easter Island is one example where the evidence shows the society perished as it consumed all its natural resources... but not before turning to cannibalism.

          Originally posted by shakes
          So I say more power to those who choose not having kids is the responsible thing to do. Even if it is a selfish thing to do (not have kids so you can focus on your own life) ... isn't it better to be honest with your selfishness than to be a sub par parent?
          Ah, but is it selfish, really? Compare that to the person who is spending thousands on fertility treatments or desparately trying to have a baby when there are over 250,000 kids waiting for adoption. The selfless individual so strongly desiring a child will take care of those in need, before serving their own needs. And when you meet someone trying to have kids, see if they can provide just five reasons to reproduce without using the phrase "I/We want". "I/We want" denotes selfishness.

          By contrast, it is selfish to require a "mini-me" to add meaning to my life, if you set aside the societal conditioning we've been beat over the head with all our lives.

          Originally posted by shakes
          the bane of our existance is that reproducing is easy to do on accident (if you're irresponsible) also enjoyable. So it stands that those who are irresponsible, and therefore more likely to be bad parents, are statistically more likely to reproduce.
          Yeah, that does suck! That means we're inevitably surrounded by idiots!

          Originally posted by shakes
          what a world.
          In deed! It's makes for an interesting trip!!!
          My first attempt at a carputer.

          PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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          • #6
            What really sucks is smart people with no kids and stupid hillbillies with 10+, or is where I live getting to me?

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Curiosity
              What really sucks is smart people with no kids and stupid hillbillies with 10+, or is where I live getting to me?
              It's that way in Atlanta, too. But the stupidity isn't limited to the hillbillies, here. Many of the soccer moms and dads of Alpharetta ("the" suburb for familes) seemed to be drinking the same water.
              My first attempt at a carputer.

              PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by C4M
                *Some* of us don't judge you for your choice.

                Don't make the same mistake, and judge me for choosing differently to you.


                Fair enough?

                C!
                Fair enough. Please note that I included the rofl figure then followed my "biting" statement with "But seriously". It was meant as a joke.
                My first attempt at a carputer.

                PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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                • #9
                  im tired of watching people on jerry springer. To be honest id shoot the dumb ****s. Kinda off subject, there is this crack head girl down town, where im working at right now. Every time i see her she begs for money. If i had my way id just shoot her. Now there is a lady that is quiet and picks up cans on the side of the street and down in the creeks. Shes an older lady, i wish someone would lend her a hand.
                  I GIVE FREE HUGS!
                  Buy Sell or Trade
                  If my pm box is full, please feel free to call me any time. 440-328-3382
                  Thank you
                  Forex
                  Rate Mp3car @ FXroot.com

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by C4M
                    Figured that was likely the case. Didn't want this thread turn into another breeder basher (I've had enough of those threads elsewhere)!

                    C!
                    Nah! We (my fiance and I) reserve the breeder-bashing for our table conversations when "parents" allow their kids to run around restaurants (and even bars) like they're on a playground. I could never be a waiter!
                    My first attempt at a carputer.

                    PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by jjh221
                      im tired of watching people on jerry springer. To be honest id shoot the dumb ****s.
                      That reminds me - the other day, I think it was Indiana, is considering selling hunting licenses in rural areas for feral cats. I guess the wild feline population is so great that it's an issue the local government is getting involved in.
                      My first attempt at a carputer.

                      PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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                      • #12
                        I am more afraid to have children with the state of mind that most women are in, I dont want to end up being a single parent. My parents divorced when I was 13 and that was the most painful thing i've ever had to endure. So I would much rather not drag children into the screwed up relationships that seem to be happening nowadays.

                        at least thats how I feel

                        no offense against the women on this board.
                        肚子笑痛了
                        S60 Install

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by R32 JUhl
                          That reminds me - the other day, I think it was Indiana, is considering selling hunting licenses in rural areas for feral cats. I guess the wild feline population is so great that it's an issue the local government is getting involved in.
                          Indiana, Wisconsin whatever. Like i said, i can agree with selective shooting. Me I really want kids. I feel I have the ability to speak to them with out words to get them to understand. Id love to have a child and something to take care of and to pass on my name. Im not saying you should too but if you ever wanted to and found that perhaps its not such a bad idea, after you get setteld down. I not gonna say anything. I can also understand where you are comming from. I have days like that when I dont want anything but just to live for me.
                          I GIVE FREE HUGS!
                          Buy Sell or Trade
                          If my pm box is full, please feel free to call me any time. 440-328-3382
                          Thank you
                          Forex
                          Rate Mp3car @ FXroot.com

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by jcdillin
                            I am more afraid to have children with the state of mind that most women are in, I dont want to end up being a single parent. My parents divorced when I was 13 and that was the most painful thing i've ever had to endure. So I would much rather not drag children into the screwed up relationships that seem to be happening nowadays.

                            at least thats how I feel

                            no offense against the women on this board.
                            Regarding that "state of mind" you mention... a good friend of mine was relating to me that he saw part of the problem stemming from the emphasis the reality shows are placing on marriage. From "Marry a Millioniare" to "The Bachelor", it seems there is a constant barrage of imagery that marriage is where it's at. And when you see the way some of these gals FIGHT for the men, it's unnerving (to say the least).

                            But the concern over a divorce w/kids is a valid one. The stats are showing that half of all marriages end in divorce. 78% of those marriages produced children either before or during the marriage. I'm not trying to insinuate that children were the cause of the marriage falling apart (even if that's my personal opinion). But it is support that your concerns are valid.
                            My first attempt at a carputer.

                            PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by jjh221
                              Im not saying you should too but if you ever wanted to and found that perhaps its not such a bad idea, after you get setteld down.
                              I'm 36 in a few weeks. By the time I "settle down", I'll have to be stinky rich like Hef to find a proper piece to get me in the mood!
                              My first attempt at a carputer.

                              PM me if you're interested in a monitor faceplate for your '99-'04 Golf or Jetta. My Vortex ID is NorthAtlR32 - you can IM me there, too. Go here for more information.

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