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Thread: Me + Fire + Gasoline + Chicks = A Dumb Bastard

  1. #1
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    Me + Fire + Gasoline + Chicks = A Dumb Bastard

    alrighty... well.... we were having a bonfire at my house. Well we stacked the wood... got the gasoline (You have to sue gasoline, its more fun that way) and poured it on the fired and proceeded to make a line of gasoline that led away from the fire then made a nice inwards spiral at the end of the line. The plan was to stand in the middle of the spiral, light the end on fire and watch the fire trace the spiral to the fire and catch the wood on fire. So... I lit the gas on fire. It did not follow the pattern but proceeded to light the whole spiral on fire at the same, thus leaving me in a huge flame spiral that was out of control. I stood there for a second or two thinking, "Crap, now what do I do." Then, I looked down to see that my leg hair on my right leg was on fire.... I proceeded to run like hell. So, the fire was lit and my leg hairs burnt off. Mission accomplished.

    Next, my buddy brought three cute chicks from Woodlake over (yes, woodlake believe it or not). So, we started making designs in the dirt and lighting it on fire and watching it follow the trail. After that got boring.. my buddy josh and I made a long gasoline line and lit it on fire. In order to impress the girls, we decieded to run the line of fire and see how long we could so. I got pretty far the first time so we decieded to try it again. I was determiend to make it the whole way. He got about 3/4ths down and jumped off... I got like 6/8ths the way and was in too much pain to finish. I ran to the wet grass to put my toe in the dew on the grass. The fricken DG we had lit the fire in had stuck to my big toe burning the crap out of it. I don't have a blister since it got me on a callise on my big toe, but the mother hurts like hell. It aches soo bad. I have come to the conclusion that I would rather drown than burn to dealth.

    The Moral of the story:No matter how cool you think you will be, no matter how much your trying to impress the ladies, DO NOT walk on a line of fire your buddy created with gasoline in the dirt..... bad things happen! Ouch!

    I am truly a dumb bastard.
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  2. #2
    jol
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    Re: Me + Fire + Gasoline + Chicks = A Dumb Bastard

    LOL! that was a good one


    edit: [23:23:51] * Myking sparkar på jol's engelska. ;OP


    (Myking = 3vil)

  3. #3
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    AHAHA Ive had my share of dumb gas+fire tricks...

    but that is truly the coolest!
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  4. #4
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    I actually did blister..... 8 hours today at work was hell! I stand all day in a meat dpeartment... so I was favorign the right side of my foot to stay off the burns and now my right side of the foot is bruised... sigh I cant win
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  5. #5
    pcman_cortina
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    hmm stupid **** fits better

    go for a visit to the local hospital and go to the burns ward im sure that will change your mind

    when i was 12 my brother decided that it would be fun to play with metho and in the process managed to set me on fire

    i spent 9 months in hospital 32 skin graphs plus numerous problems that are still occuring

    it makes me sick to think that you think its funny to try to run through fire

    its stupid ****s like you that make americans look soooo stupid

    o i saw this on tv so i can do it

    anyway

    pcman

  6. #6
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    eesh, I can see why you are upset, cuz what happened to you really suxs. But, this post was totaly out of line. I am truly sorry it happened to you, really. But there was no reason to attack me like. I can live with being a stupid bastard, but '****' I will not.
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  7. #7
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    In general gasoline is dangerous.

    My dad had a gopher problem, he poured 2 liters (i think is about a half gallon) of gasoline into the hole and after a while he threw in a match ... pretty much blew up half of the garden

    So take my advice gasoline is dangerous and its not a toy.

    I understand pcman, but think he is quite affected (and understandably so) by his incident. And i know i would react in pretty much the same way (well without the namecalling).

  8. #8
    Retired Admin Aaron Cake's Avatar
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    I've been on fire before several times....It's not fun.

    But one thing puzzles me....I know that if I was a girl, this would not impress me. In fact, it would probably have the exact opposite effect, making me think "geez, if this bozo would do that just to impress me, what else can I make him do/buy for me?".

    Yes, I'd be a *****.
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  9. #9
    I've got no answer! Question's Avatar
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    I was about to say the same thing.. Unless you were in caveman days and actually invented fire, I don't think it's really gonna impress a girl to say "Watch me set gas on fire!"...

  10. #10
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    Well I was gonna say that you were a dumb bastard before the girls were even involved, but playing with fire to impress girls just makes one a dumb ignorant bastard.

    I don't know what synapses fire in the male brain that make us think girls are attracted to the same things we are (danger, loud cars, revving engines, playing with fire, etc.) but learning what women really desire is usually enough to make the difference between a total loser and a gentleman.

    You were fortunate. Extremely fortunate. To have something that insignificant result from something that stupid is a true blessing.

    I agree with your moral of the story. Did you glean any more than just that one?

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