I wonder if something like this is a possible solution:
It's hard to tell how small those things are. I can probably scrape off a tiny bit of plastic off the back of the button near the center contact and hook around it. Or maybe there's enough space around the contact without any scraping. I don't know if there would be enough gap between the other two contacts to prevent shorting though. Worth a try?
EDIT: I think the answer to all my problems is this: http://www.emulation.com/catalog/off...yourself_clip/
You can see that it's clipped to a microchip, and the gap between contacts there is same, if not smaller. I'll make a trip to Radioshack after work tonight and if they don't have something like that, I guess I'll have to order a couple from Amazon. I'll clip them on and secure them to the pcb to ensure they don't fall off.